Well ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow night is the night . Yes, tomorrow night, I am going to a group hypnosis session for weight loss. There have been 2, yes 2, ads for the hypno people in the paper. One session is $50 the other asks for a “donation if you can afford it” of $5. Which one do you think I am going to? Hmmm???
I went to check out their website, and now I am kind of worried cause I read this:
ARE YOU MENTALLY CAPABLE OF RECEIVING HYPNOTHERAPY? To achieve a hypnotic state you must have a sound mind and a brain which properly functions. If you have certain kinds of brain damage which disables your ability to hear and pay attention to a hypnotherapist, or If you are afflicted with a sever personality disorder such as an antisocial behavioral disorder, or have been clinically diagnosed as bipolar, paranoid or schizoid, you may not be hypnotizable in a **name of hypno group** hypnotherapy session.
Holy crap, it might not work for me after all!!!! Is that a squirrel? What am I gonna do? Quick look a mouse! I’ll be out $5!! *swear word swear word* (that was my turretts again) I can’t afford to waste $5!!
Wish me luck!!!!!
Oh crap crap crap! I went back and read some more and LOOK!!
WHAT TO WEAR AND BRING WITH YOU: It is possible, while in a somnambulistic state of hypnosis, that you will drool. Tears may come from your eyes and mucus may drain from your nose.
I gotta stop reading that stuff !!!!
Dammit, enough already! I really need to stay away from their site. I just found out that it won’t work if you have been diagnosed as having intelligence below the level of “moron” OR if you have NO IMAGINATION. And the real kicker? No booze! What?!
