3,169. That’s the number of messages in my bulk mail folder on yahoo, today. (I apparently didn’t empty it yesterday.) Here are some of my favorites:
“My Name… Quit smoking with NicoDerm CQ free” Um, when did I take up smoking? I guess if I want to start, I know where to go to quit… changed my name to My Name, since as you will find later on, I won some money..alot of it.
“Drop 12 pounds by Friday!” Holy freakin cow!! 12 pounds by TOMORROW??? Is that possible, I mean without cutting off an appendage?
Find the right person for you…maybe right around the corner. Um, I think I found him, but if he’s here and around the corner..holy heck he’s gonna see I’m still bedheaded and in my pj’s…and it’s 11 am.
you have been selected to win a Million Dollars Finally!!! I’ve been waiting for this for a long time. Now I can help my best friend and she can quit her job!!
Enter to win an Extreme Beauty Makeover Because I’m gonna need it when I lose 12 pounds by tomorrow.
Second Attempt: myname@yahoo.com $250 Wal-mart Gift Card More like 2,000th attempt, let’s be honest. Anyone want to start a “truth in spam mail” bill? Come on! Sure could come in handy once I lose that 12 pounds overnight, and get my extreme makeover. I WILL need some new clothes ya know. I’m actually quite insulted in the amount because I was just selected to win a MILLION BUCKS.
My Name, Say bye bye to those american thighs Will I do this before or after the makeover??? I should email them back to be sure.
Get rid of embarrassing baldspots Yah, because I’m sure losing 12 pounds overnight will definately cause some nutritional imbalance and my hair will fall out!!
Get Your Pantene® Sample On Us Gonna need that too because I will have beautiful hair once those baldspots are gone.
My name: your lending rates getting behind in Grand Forks Air Force Base This one is always a favorite of mine, like we could actually buy our house on base. (Now that I think of it, this would be one heck of a rumor we could start!)
At least there weren’t any “Enlarge your pheniss in 10 easy steps”. Always nice to know that I can enlarge something that I don’t even have.
